Planning an Out-of-State Wedding

I've been fortunate to visit many different places around the world through my work as a news anchor. I currently live in Reno, but I grew up in Los Angeles, San Diego and Texas (Go Longhorns!). I also lived in both Spain and Costa Rica. Needless to say, my fiancé Chris and I have many friends from different area codes, so throwing a destination wedding is the best choice for us. 

Ideally, we want to spend a few days with our guests to have more time to catch up and create special memories together. The thought of having just one night with friends who we haven't seen in years sounds heartbreaking! However, we also understand that not everyone can afford a full-blown vacation to a far-away place, so we'd like to choose an affordable destination located in the United States.

san diego wedding
Photo by: Jessica Hannon Photography on Jessica Hannon Photography via Lover.ly

We'd like to make the event as budget-friendly as possible, so we're strongly considering getting married in October, which is just after peak wedding season in most places. That may help keep hotel rates and airfare low. We're also going to look for hotels that offer a wedding block rate. Either way, it will be less expensive than a trip to the Caribbean and no one will need to dig up (or apply for) their passports.

Chris and I are strongly leaning towards getting married in San Diego because that's where we both dream of living to raise our future surfer children. Plus, most of my loved ones live in SoCal, so if we do get married there, then my mom and my other relatives can help check on places for us.

However, I'm really hoping that my fiancé and I can do a lot of the booking ourselves. We're both busy with our careers (he's a police officer), but we're both committed to checking tasks off our list. I can spend my free time doing research and it doesn't feel overwhelming right now, since it's similar to what I do as a journalist.

neda iranpour

But should we limit our wedding venue search to cities we've been to or try a whole new place? I would love to go back to some of our favorite Napa Valley spots to see if a winery wedding is for us. And what about Lake Tahoe where our relationship was sealed with a ring? I would like to fully embrace this wedding search and take a few getaways to visit venues in person until we find the spot that feels "right."

Then there's the guest list — we may end up having around 250 people. The plan is to have our loved ones arrive around two or three days before we get married and to host a nice brunch the day after the wedding before everyone has to fly out. Once our last guest leaves, Chris and I will jet off to our honeymoon (we'd like to go somewhere tropical but we're not exactly sure where yet).

Of course, not all of our guests may be able to attend for the full four or five days, so I would like to create an itinerary so that guests can check off boxes for the events they would like to join.

As far as excursions, we're thinking of organizing fun and active events such as paddleboarding, a brewery tour, a trip to the zoo and scuba diving. I was also thinking of hosting our own wedding version of a half marathon or 10K the day prior to the ceremony. How cool would it be for our guests to check that off their bucket list?! I know, I know...there's a lot to organize here.

wedding program of events
Photo on Society Bride via Lover.ly

This doesn't even include planning all of the pre-wedding parties! As soon as we got engaged, all of my friends assumed I would have a crazy getaway weekend in Vegas; they know me too well. We may also have an engagement party in San Diego with our SoCal friends and family and another one in Tahoe for our NorCal friends and family. Then there's the bridal shower...do we need to have one? We may be partied out.

I think that hiring a wedding planner will be a good idea for more than just the wedding night. We would need someone who's familiar with the area to coordinate all of the excursions and manage the crowd as we head from one hot spot to the next. It would be helpful to hire a third-party planner, not someone who solely works as an on-site planner.

This will all add up so like any bride, I find myself fantasizing about winning the lottery so we can take care of all the costs for our guests. While I throw out all of my ideas, Chris has been seeing the dollar signs add up. Even this early on in the planning process, we are discovering that I will be more of the brainstormer while he keeps me in check.

In the end, what matters most is that we get to bask in the beauty that comes with familiar faces and family while making that lifelong promise to one another. First things first — we're off to search for venues. Let the mini-vacations begin!

We would really like to hear from other brides planning an out-of-state wedding. What has your experience been like? We’d love any advice that you have to share! Check out our destination wedding countdown calendar to stay on track.

— Neda Iranpour

P.S. Have an interesting wedding planning story to share? Apply to become a real bride blogger here ►

neda iranpourNeda Iranpour's fiancé, Chris, proposed to her after she ran three marathons in three days around Lake Tahoe. In keeping with the couple's adventurous spirit, they plan to have a four-day destination wedding somewhere in the United States. They can't wait to enjoy a fun-filled wedding experience with their guests, complete with paddleboarding, kayaking, running, dancing, sipping fine wine and drinking craft beer. Chris is a fun-loving, dedicated police officer and Neda is an Emmy-award winning news anchor who loves to share stories, even her own.