It might seem strange to have Dad as your wedding planner, but with my circumstances, it just made natural sense. (As I've mentioned in past posts, my fiancé Michael is deployed in Afghanistan, so I'm planning our wedding in San Diego from across the country, in New York.) A couple of months ago, I realized I needed to call in reinforcements, so I found a planner in Cali who completely shared my vision. I was enamoured with her ideas—until I got the quote. I was seriously considering dropping $2,400 for her help, but when I brought it up to my dad, he enthusiastically offered to plan the wedding himself. I knew he'd always have my back, but I was surprised by just how thrilled he was to take part in my wedding. It was a big relief.
Since I've asked him to take over, my dad has secured the venue, DJ, rentals and linens, florist, and photographer. Basically, all the heavy lifting is done. Luckily, we haven't had any disagreements yet. He's happy to hear me out if I don't like something or would prefer a more affordable vendor, so I never feel pressured to go with his first choice or afraid to say no. The planning process is new to both of us, so we're learning everything together and having fun in the process! Dad's a natural—he talks to strangers with ease and even thrives on it (much to my embarrassment as a teenager). He loves to brag about his son-in-law, too, so he'll use any excuse to bring up his brave soldier in conversation.
My dad has always said we’re kindred spirits—we just get each other. Although he and my mom split up when I was pretty young, we’ve always been close. The summer after I graduated from college, I moved in with him and my step-mom, Jeanne, for the summer. It was the first time I’d lived with him in over 15 years, but that summer, we forged an inseparable bond that we’ve been able to maintain ever since. As soon as anyone meets him, they instantly think he’s the coolest 50-something they know. He’s funny, friendly, considerate, and a good listener, which is a bundle of qualities that’s hard to come by.
I asked my dad to share why he’s so excited to be the mastermind behind my special day:
“Being divorced from Lisa's mom when she was five, I have always felt that I need to be a bigger part of her life. Daddy's little girl was growing up, and although I'm always there when she needs me, this would be the perfect opportunity to help her. With no one else taking the reins, I knew this would be my opportunity to show her, and Michael, how much I care. Michael, my fighting hero in Afghanistan, needs to have the greatest homecoming. I am certainly not a professional, and not as organized as I would like, but I know Lisa will be happy when this all comes together.”
He got one thing wrong—I’m already thrilled. I can’t put into words how much his participation means to me. I would have never been able to do all the things that are necessary to throwing a successful wedding on my own, since I'm located so far away from San Diego. It's an enormous relief and I know the party will be great. Thanks, Dad!
Leave a comment and tell us about the person who's been the most instrumental in your wedding planning. Is it your Mom, Dad, best friend, coworker? We'd love to hear.
—Lisa Turner
Lisa Turner is a real bride who is navigating the planning process with her friends and family while her groom, Michael Turner, is serving in Afghanistan. Already married last year, the high school sweethearts will have an official reception in January of 2013 in San Diego when he returns to the U.S. The party will take place in a clubhouse near the beach, complete with Mexican and vintage-inspired touches to celebrate their marriage in a fun and very California way.
